OCTOBER 2005
FATHER KEVIN BATES
FATHER AMARO SAUMELL
CATHOLICVIEW STAFF

FATHER KEVIN BATES


 

Father Kevin:

In the story of Creation, who is the "us" that God refers to when He says "Let us make man in our image, after our likeness" and "See! The man has become like one of us?”  Thanks for your help.  Jim
 

Hi Jim - you'd probably need to talk to a good Scripture Scholar to get an answer to this one that is definitive.   From where I sit however, it seems that it is probably a matter of literary style, or the "Royal We" as we used to call it when Kings and Queens and sometimes Popes used the Plural to refer to themselves.  In the light of subsequent revelation we could also speculate that it refers to the Persons of the Trinity.  Kind regards,  Father Kevin

 

 

Father:

I have been reading about the revelations and requirements Our Blessed Lady told us about at Fatima i.e. Prayer and Penance. I understand prayer, but at 74 yrs, I am a little confused about what meaningful penance I could perform. While I don't demean giving up candy for Lent, and sackcloth and ashes don't seem appropriate, can you give me some ideas? Thank you. – Tom

Hi Tom and thanks for your question.

The most traditional notion of penance or sacrifice involves a total focus on the one for whom we are making the sacrifice, rather than the cost of the sacrifice.  So for instance, the early Jewish people were totally focused on seeking communion with God so they offered the best of their crops and flocks as a sign of that.  We have sometimes developed a bit of a lop-sided notion of sacrifice, focusing on what we were giving up rather than the purpose of the penance.  Our purpose, like that of the early people in the Scripture stories, is to reach out for God as best we can, with whatever we can, given our aging, our health situation or energy and our other resources. 

A good parallel is the way that parents sacrifice so much for their children.  While they are aware of the cost, their main focus in the well-being, health and progress of their children, and the consideration of the cost is secondary. 
 

So if we are focused on the One we love, then we'll know what to do without anyone else having to tell us.   All good wishes, Father Kevin

 

 

Father Kevin:

Why do we pray for the dead?  At the time of our death, God judges us and determines if we will have everlasting life in heaven or He turns us away to hell.  As our prayers can't change His decision no matter how much we pray what good does prayer do?   Also, my father was an Episcopalian his entire life and was a good man.  The Baltimore Catholicism and Catholic publications I've read recently are still stating that the Catholic Faith is still the only true faith since it goes back to the beginning of time and therefore only Catholics will go to heaven.  From when we were small children, my mother made my siblings and me pray for dad that when he died he would go to heaven.  What should we realistically believe today?  Our mother passed away in April of this year and dad passed away 15 years ago.  I believe they are both together in heaven now.  Are our prayers and the masses we have said for them being wasted? - Roseann


 

Dear Roseann,

We sure had a habit of making burdens for people's backs when it came to considerations like these.  I grew up similarly to you, thinking that only our mob would get to heaven, and that the other kids in the street, with whom I played on the weekends, would sadly miss out.  It never seemed quite right - and it wasn't.  I am sure your Mum and Dad are joyfully together in God's heart if we take the gospel at all seriously.  Jesus made all sorts of people welcome, and made it clear that His good news was for all. 

Much of that teaching about Catholics being the only ones getting to heaven was a reaction to the Protestant Reformation which saw so many embracing the Reformers' Churches.  Some of it was based on the belief that one had to be baptized in order to be saved.  The Church always taught that baptism of desire would suffice if actual baptism was not available. 

Vatican 2 in the Constitution on the Church in the Modern World states that all people of good will can be saved, and that this is indeed God's intention.  Pope John Paul wrote at the end of the Jubilee year: "We need to remember that no one can be excluded from our love, since through his Incarnation, the Son of God has united himself in some fashion with every person." Pope  John Paul II Novo Millenio Inuente, Jan 2001

If we take seriously our belief that God is love, then this makes sense.  A god that excludes people simply because of the religion or culture into which they are born is absurd.  Through history we have developed so many divisions to make us feel safe from each other, from evil, etc - and these forces are at work in our world at the moment.  The gospel is a real alternative - in God's heart everyone and everything belongs.

Finally, why pray for the dead - In our Catholic tradition there is a sound instinct that at the time of or death, there will possibly be parts of our heart that still cry out for healing and homecoming.  You are right when you say that nothing will change God's mind, but again if God is love, and is the one that we love, it is surely natural to cry out to God on behalf of our loved ones, in the sure hope that they will find rest and life. 

Very finally, I believe that it is not God who decides our fate, but we do.  That is what human freedom is all about - God gives us the choice "I put before you life and death you must choose" - Deuteronomy.   If we are to lose salvation, it is our choice, not God's. God's purpose is that all should be saved.  Every blessing.  Father Kevin



FATHER AMARO SAUMELL

Dear Father:

I live in Texas and I constantly have Jehovah's Witnesses and others knocking on my door and rambling on about their beliefs. When I tell them I am Catholic they argue even more. How do I get my point across that I don't want them at my door and that what they are doing is wrong? - Jennifer

 

Dear Jennifer,

Traveling salesmen, charity collectors, and religious zealots at the door can all be irritating.  I always remember what a psychology professor told our class at one time, “We must always be kind.   We don’t have to be nice.  To be nice is being a wimp. Being kind is being a Christian.”  In other words, one can always be assertive. Sometimes this means saying, “I’m not interested, thank you” and closing the door. Did you ever notice an “in control” leader?  He or she will give no response, no argument.  He or she might listen till the other’s story is exhausted.  No argument will be offered.  This disarms the other person kindly.  Always remember that God loves that person and we must too.  However, no person ever has to deal with abuse. - God bless, Fr. Amaro

 



 

Father Amaro:

If purgatory purges us of "attachment to creaturely things", how can a plenary indulgence perform this "necessity”?  For instance, if I struggle with alcoholism before the indulgence is granted, and still do immediately after the indulgence is granted, don't I still need purging? - Philip

Dear Phillip,

Possibly.  You see, by your participating in an act that brings a plenary indulgence, part of that purging has already taken place in your surrender to understanding.  Remember, the fire that purges just may be the fire of the Holy Spirit working within you.  Does that sound too simple?  Don’t make God more complicated than He wants to be for us.  He wants to love us into heaven through the covenant of His Son and by the presence of the Holy Spirit Who purges us through our conversion.  Recognize the simple.  That is where wisdom is found.   It is we human beings that make things complicated.  God bless, Fr. Amaro

 

Father Amaro:

Does Modern Catholicism still believe that suicide is a mortal sin whereupon the soul goes directly to hell, with no opportunity for redemption? - Jean

Dear Jean,

Let’s again recall the elements that make a sin “mortal.” 1) Grave act, 2) Sufficient reflection 3) Complete act of the will.

What has been revealed through our knowledge of psychology is that the will can be impaired through emotional or mental disorders.  In that case, how can a complete consent of the will take place?  Yes, taking one’s own life is a grave act.  It often takes much reflection and planning.  But the will behind it is very seldom complete.

Jean, in these cases we have such hope in the healing mercy of God who knows our suffering better than we do.  He knows our impairments better than we do.  My suspicion is that you know someone who took his or her own life.  One of my closest friends did that also. There are often feelings of helplessness and even anger when someone does this.  Then, when forgiveness conquers, care takes over and we worry about the salvation of that person. What we forget is that if we can forgive, how much more can God forgive the impaired will of an emotionally or mentally ill person?

Last but not least, we should never presume judgment.  That is God’s alone.  To even try is to blaspheme the first commandment.  - God bless, Fr. Amaro

 

CATHOLICVIEW STAFF

 

Catholicview Staff:

Our priest recently held a "Pet Mass" to celebrate the feast day of St. Francis of Assisi.  This Mass was held outside but as a regular Sunday Mass.  Evidently, expecting criticism from parishioners, he contacted someone in our diocese that said there was nothing in church documents to prevent a "Pet Mass."  Is this appropriate...a Pet Mass???   In my own opinion, I don't think it provides for the dignity and reverence due the Blessed Sacrament.  I and many others who expressed our concern did not have a problem with a pet blessing outside of Mass; however, felt it innappropriate during the liturgy.  I would appreciate your response. – Christine

Christine:

It is not clear whether the entire Mass was devoted to “Pets” or not.  If your priest invited people to bring their pets to Mass for a blessing, this would be inappropriate.  Blessing rituals for animals are always done outside of Mass in a separate blessing ceremony.  You did the right thing to ask the diocese about it.   There is no specific canon law or liturgical norm that prohibits animals or pets being present at Mass.  But a Mass just so people can bring their pets to church is not acceptable.  Hope this helps.  - CatholicView Staff

 

 

CatholicView Staff:

I used to be Catholic and witnessed countless times during mass, the Priest saying a Silent Blessing as he washed his hands with water during the services.  Can you please tell me what that prayer is?  Thanks for your help. Donna

Dear Donna:

The special and beautiful prayer you asked about is: “Lord, wash away my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin.”   The exact words are from Psalm 51:4! - CatholicView Staff

 

 

CatholicView:

My uncle just passed last week and was a Monsignor at this particular church. We had two questions we couldn't find answers to.  First what do they do with my uncles "holy orders"?  Is he buried with them, or do they take them away before he is buried.  Second during the mass they took the coffin to 4 corners of the church and banged it against the brick, is there a reason for this?  I was told both it is just a symbolic way to say goodbye to his church and that it was a way to "knock out" his holy orders.  We are Chaldean Americans so its very possible that these are simply traditons our culture observes, but it has been very difficult to figure out why.  Any light you can provide to answer these questions will be greatly appreciated.
God Bless, Bruce Najor

 

Bruce:

The Chaldean Rite of the Catholic Church is an Eastern Rite and there are some customs that are specific to that particular Chaldean culture.  So I, as a Roman and Western Rite member, may not understand.  As for the "HOLY ORDERS" papers and certificate (which are the certificate of ordination, first assignment and faculties, and the apostolic line of succession), please keep them and safeguard them as a family heirloom.  As for the aspect of the coffin being sent to all four corners of the church, this is a specific Chaldean custom and is not customary for the world-wide Catholic Church.  But there is no banging out of Holy Orders.  It is a symbol of his soul being freed by the Lord Jesus and now living in the eternal peace of the Lord in heaven that has no limits. – CatholicView Staff 

 

 

CatholicView Staff:

I am 64 years old and live in Australia.  I have spent most of my life away from the church, however I have been back for about two years. I try to get to mass on at least two weekdays but I often miss Sunday Mass. I cannot feel God's presence and I feel like a fraud but there is something about the Mass that goes with me for a little while. but I can't feel anything for God except that I see His work in everything I look at, but I wish I really knew why I am here and what to do about it.  Thank you.  -  Tom

 

Dear Tom:

There is a mistaken notion that many people have that to approach God, one must be perfect.  I really don't understand where we as human beings get the notion that we have to be perfect to come to church, God, and prayer.  The reason you are struggling is because you have many past regrets that you feel is separating you from God.  We believe in a God that forgives and is full of mercy.  Another reason you don’t FEEL God is because you do not allow yourself to touch the Lord.  Something is holding you back, maybe your own sense of sinfulness and unworthiness.  Remember, Jesus died for us and He died for ALL our sins.  His death on the cross nailed sin and death to that cross.  His resurrection sealed and guaranteed the sacrifice for all those that accept it.   Instead of fighting the past and your sense of unworthiness, just embrace your past and give it to the Lord.  – CatholicView Staff

 

 

CatholicView Staff:

God is asking me to do the seemingly impossible. What happens to my soul if I don't or can't do it? - Patrick

Patrick:

Unfortunately your letter is incomplete.  Remember however, God never asks the impossible; He only asks the possible. You do not write what God is asking of you.   Is this matter divinely inspired by God?  It is imperative that you talk to a priest who can advise you on this issue.  CatholicView hopes you find the peace you are seeking.  God bless. – CatholicView Staff

 

 

CatholicView Staff:

About 20 years ago I committed adultery one time with a woman I'll call Jan.  I am heartily sorry for that sin and having offended God .  I confessed it in the Sacrament of Confession and have been in a faithful and loving relationship ever since. 

However, about 10 years after, I ran into a former roommate of Jan's. She said that Jan had an abortion during the time they were roommates.  She also said that it was another man's child (Bob's).  However, due to the timing, I am very concerned that it could have been my child and Jan did not tell me because I was married at the time.   Jan and I never spoke much after the one night stand - we were both very ashamed.   My question is, if Jan had an abortion and it was my child am I in mortal sin if I did not know about it at the time, nor consent to the abortion? I am deeply troubled by this because I am wholly opposed to abortion, but also that I may have lost a child. However, I have found it difficult to confess since I don't know the actual circumstances.   Thanks for your guidance, and may God Bless you. – Brian

 

Dear Brian:

You committed a sin when you committed adultery.  BUT, you sought forgiveness for that sin and received it.  As to the loss of what might possibly had been your child, you only have hearsay.  There is no proof here.  It may have belonged to the person called Bob.

Do not dwell on the past but move on to the future.  God has granted you forgiveness for the sin you acknowledged.  Don’t let what may not be true become the reality that destroys your present and the future. 

CatholicView suggests you let it go and give it to God.  Move on to the future with the knowledge that our God understands and knows everything.   Take His forgiveness and live in His peace.   – CatholicView Staff

 

 

CatholicView Staff:

I seriously want to work out a problem.  Please help me.  I read the bible & say prayers everyday nonstop.  5 years finding for the girl I want, until now I can't get a girl friend, 2 years searching for a job.  Until now I never get a job. How do I support my family?  6 month exercise & exercise my weight never lost, remain as 100kg & I get many sickness.  How do my parent & my brother all the time spend money on hospital bill, medicine bills?  My parent & my brother tell me, quickly find a job.  6 months I read bible, say prayer nothing works out, how do I come up in life?  I have asked everyone, No one wants to help me.  I don't know why nothing is working out. Now I have no saving money & helpless.  I have no friend.   My uncle & auntie don't like me & don’t help me.  My parent & my brother look down on me & they never help me.  I can’t travel to find job, or go anywhere from home.  My family is helpless. I feel very stressful & I feel like killing myself.  I am helpless.  Please help me? What should I do? How do I help myself? How do I pray that God will help me? - Bala

 Dear Bala:

I am so sorry that things do not seem to be working for you.  I want to tell you to have faith in God and know that He hears your prayers and will help you.  But you must believe that He will come through for you.

When you pray, ask the Lord to strengthen your faith and strengthen your body.  Ask Him to help you find work and happiness and thank Him in advance as a test of that faith. 

It sounds like you need to seek the help of a priest who can sort out this multitude of things that has caused you great stress and sadness.  Please go and discuss these problems with your parish priest.

Let us ask God right now to change the circumstances in your life:  We pray that the Lord pours out His precious blessings your way, send His mighty angels to minister to you in your time of great need, and to comfort and console you.  We pray that He will grant an abundance of joy into your life.  We ask all this in the powerful name of Jesus Christ, our Savior, Amen. – CatholicView Staff

 

 

CatholicView Staff:

I am 53 years old, Catholic, presently married for 22 years with one son age 19.  I have had an extra-marital affair, for the last four years, with a 40 years old Hispanic female (no children).  I am in my second marriage.   My first one was annulled by the church.  She has been married twice and is divorced. She is a cradle, non-practicing catholic.  I have received sacramental absolution several times recently; having felt this relationship is immoral, deceitful and wicked.  However, I seem to "backslide" and have had sex again and again.  Physically, she is a breathing beauty.  She is in love with me (I believe this to be true) and would like to one day marry me(she has had sexual affairs before with married and unmarried men - the most prominent when she was 18 and the man was then 51 and married).  We have been completely monogamous since we met in 2001. I believe I am in love with her, but honestly, it hurts me to lie to my wife and I feel physically and emotionally sick.  The unbelievable part is, I could say goodbye to this person, but it pains me to think of her sexually with another man after I've departed the relationship.  This seems to indicate I am in love with lust for her, not spiritually in love.  I know what I must/should do, but I would really appreciate your position in this matter.  Thank you very much for your time and attention. God Bless + - Jack

Dear Jack:

I wonder what is it about the commandment, “Do not commit adultery” that you don’t understand?  We are called to faithfulness, faithfulness to God, to your wife, and to your son.  I am sure that you do not feel that you have passion in your marriage and seek it from outside your marriage.  But this search for passion that satisfies only you is total selfishness, a narcissistic destructive behavior that will destroy what you have worked for the past 22 years.  I also do not know the motivations of the other woman in her seeking you to marry her.  I cannot judge that.  I can only tell you that God wants and expects faithfulness from you.  You know what you must do:  reaffirm your marriage vows and walk with your family to heaven.  Leave all sin behind. - CatholicView Staff 

 

 

CatholicView:

I have been married for 19 years and I am only 39 years old and my wife is 39 also.  She no longer wants to have sex, simply put she is not interested, and she won’t go to counseling with me.  I am a practicing Catholic I attend mass weekly and say the rosary each day, she is Catholic but not practicing and does not attend mass.  I really miss having sex, and I am a little embarrassed to talk to my local priest about it.  Any advise or guidance would be greatly appreciated.  Thank you and God Bless. – JG

 

Dear JG:

It is not clear what the relationship with your wife is like.  Do you have children?  Have you had a crisis between you?  Sometimes there is a reason for division in a marriage.  Why not try a little romance (such as flowers, going out for dinner, extra attention, etc.) without putting on pressure for intimate relations? 

You need to speak to a priest or counselor and discuss the particulars of your relationship.  Go to another parish if you do not feel comfortable speaking to the priest in your parish.    If your wife won’t go with you for help, go by yourself.  You may be able to learn things you haven’t thought of before.  May God be with you during this unsettling time.  – CatholicView Staff  

 

 

CatholicView Staff:

In the Catholic faith, should boys be circumcised?  Thanks.  Loni

Dear Loni:

In the Christian Faith and our Catholic Tradition, circumcision is not required to be a believer in Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior (read Galatians Chapter 2 and 3 concerning the religious practice of circumcision).  In my personal opinion, for the medical reason of cleanliness alone, boys should be circumcised, regardless of faith.  Ask your doctor for advice on this issue.  CatholicView Staff 

 

 CatholicView Staff:

 Will we recognize people in heaven that we knew them on earth? - John

Dear John:

This is a legitimate question many would like to know.  Yes, you will be able to recognize the people you knew on earth.  This is part of our hope, joy and happiness to know that we will see those we love and care about in God’s heaven.  – CatholicView Staff

 

CatholicView staff:

My daughter has never been confirmed and is planning to get married in the Catholic Church.  She has been baptized and has received the Holy Eucharist.  Is Confirmation mandatory to be wed in the church?

 

Regina:

No, being confirmed is not mandatory but you should see your priest as he will have the final say concerning the preparation of your wedding.  CatholicView Staff

Dear Catholic View,

On occasion I like to have a drink or two at social events / weddings.  I do not drink to get drunk.  Recently, I was at an event and because I hadn't eaten in a while, I started to feel the effects of the alcohol while I was on my second drink.  This does not normally happen, so I finished the beer and just drank water.  I did not intend to intoxicate myself, but I'm wondering if I'm guilty of drunkenness (or failing to avoid the near temptation of sin) because I started to feel the alcohol's effects.  I appreciate your help. - Steve

Dear Steve:

It is good that you are concerned about your intake of alcohol.  You are acting wisely and humanly trying to do the right thing.  God recognizes your efforts and understands your good intentions to avoid the occasion of sin.

Use your knowledge to avoid having that extra drink.  God is a loving God and knows that you do not want to be guilty of drunkenness.   Being in a state of intoxication can lead to many sins including endangering yourself and others as well.  Be moderate and continue to monitor your actions.  May the Lord strengthen you in your resolve and bless you always.   CatholicView Staff

 

CatholicView Staff:

If God predetermines a persons life then free will for humans would be irrelevant because our lives are already predetermined and planned out for us. How does God's will co-exist with a person’s free will?

Dear Clive:

I believe you will find your answer if you will use this link.  http://catholicvu.com/newpage15.htm .  Father Amaro Saumell addresses this issue in A CatholicView in an interview titled “How Free is Free Will with God’s Foreknowledge?”  – CatholicView Staff

 

CatholicView Staff:

Last night my mother and I were sitting in the kitchen eating dinner when she told me that when she was 17 she had an abortion.

I am at a loss for words. I am strictly pro-life and had always assumed my mother was the same way.

I am concerned for her, more than anything - I am scared that because she has done such a terrible thing when she was younger that there is not way she can save her soul and gain admittance into the kingdom of heaven.

Please help me - I need to know if there is something she or even I can do that will clean her slate - the mere thought of my mother being in hell fills me with so much pain. She is a wonderful, sweet, caring woman who helps everyone she meets. Please, is there anything she can do?

 

Dear Janice:

Please remember that God is an all knowing, loving and forgiving God.  If any of us commit a sin, no matter how vile, and genuinely asks for His unending forgiveness, He gives it to us.

The Lord knows we are not perfect and that is why He sent His most precious Son to die for us.  Every single sin we commit and are sorry for has been paid for and nailed to that cross over 2,000 years ago.  Do not be frightened for your mother any longer.  If she has confessed her sin to God and has not repeated that sin, it has been wiped clean.  This is ALL she needs to do to erase the sin.   Tell your mother to continue to keep her faith and stay on the path Christ has set for us all.  Do not dwell on the past but look forward to the glorious future.  Be at peace.   Your mother, through her prayer of asking for forgiveness, has been cleansed.  CatholicView Staff

 

CatholicView Staff:

My husband has been brain injured for 6 years.  I’m 52 and think I'm in love with another man?  Help me.   Yvette

 

Yvette:

Do you remember your marriage vows?  You promised before God that you would love your husband in sickness and in health, for better or worse.

Your husband needs you now.  As hard as this situation is for you, you are still bound by the bonds of Holy Matrimony.  See your priest and discuss this matter.  - CatholicView Staff 


CatholicView Staff:

A year ago I married a 50-year-old bachelor who suffers from scrupulosity (OCD), and he lives in denial so he will not accept therapy.  He is bitter, resentful and jealous with life.  How do my kids and I cope and live a normal life? – Donna

 

Dear Donna:

Have you sought supportive help for you and your children?  This is a painful and disruptive condition for you and your children to experience.  You will need the help of a professional who understands obsessive-compulsive disorders, someone who will sit down and give you alternatives to protect yourself and especially your young children.  Please get assistance with this problem.  May the Lord give you strength to seek the help you need..  God bless.  – CatholicView Staff

 


 

SEPTEMBER 2005

FATHER AMARO SAUMELL
FATHER KEVIN BATES
CATHOLICVIEW STAFF

 

FATHER KEVIN BATES

Dear Father Kevin:

I understand that to receive Holy Communion one has to be in a state of grace. My question is, can one attain that state without going to confession for previous sins?  What if one is truly sorry and has prayed for forgiveness?  I ask this because confession is not readily accessible to me and I want to know if I have to be separated from the body of Christ until the next opportunity for confession arises?  Thank you.  Jana

Hello Jana:

Thank you for your question.  I suppose we could consider your question from a couple of different points of view.  If one was to look simply at the law regarding serious sin, then the Church still teaches that it is necessary to confess one's serious sins prior to receiving Holy Communion again.    However, the law has always recognized that it is sometimes not possible to access Reconciliation, and at the time a sincere act of sorrow and an intention to make amends, and also to confess these sins when possible, is sufficient for one to receive Communion. 

One could also look at your question not from a legal but rather from a relational point of view.  If I know someone really well, I don't normally need to refer to the law, or call the police when we are having difficulties in our relationship.  We know that the law is there in case we require its help, but in the normal run of events, we don't need to call in the law-keepers.  In the same way, if my relationship with God is generally alive and well, and there are a few bruises and misunderstandings along the way caused by my sin, then normally I can work it out with God myself.  It really depends on how at home one is with God.  The law is there of course to remind us that our acts of love and our sins are never just private matters.  We always act as members of the Body of Christ, and so one important role of the sacrament is to reconcile us with the community of the Body of Christ.  Having said all this, for someone who normally walks in God's company well, it is pretty nigh impossible to commit a sin that would kill off our relationship with God totally - which is what we mean by "mortal" sin.  All our normal little sins are easily forgiven in the manner that your have described in your question.  The Penitential rite at the beginning of our Eucharist can serve this purpose of forgiveness as we prepare to celebrate the gift of the Eucharist together. Every blessing to you.  Father Kevin

 

 

Father:

I have a friend who is a Christian and pastor of a non-denominational church- a person who exhibits a true closeness to God-a person of faith.  I wanted to know from her what is it that makes a person so consecrated and so connected to God.  She said that a person must have the anointing--consecrating him or herself to God and trusting Him.  I study God's Word, I pray and do His will and try to really have God to be close to my soul.  I believe that in Catholic terminology, the anointing is to let the Holy Spirit work in us that we may grow in our faith to follow His will.  St. Dominic reiterated that the more you know about God, the more you love Him. With me where is that closeness?  - Angela

Dear Angela:

Only you can answer that question of course!   Different communities use different language or images to describe what is essentially the same thing.  Anointing, Confirmation, Being born-again, Being saved, all carry similar meanings.  At the end of the day, our closeness to God comes from prayer, a readiness to live the promises of our baptism and a commitment to listening as you are evidently doing, for the sounds of God's voice in our lives, however God chooses to be revealed to us.  There is no limit to the ways in which God can be made known to us, and God can certainly not be contained within one form of language, or the culture of one or other community.  God is always bigger than any of our structures and organizations. 

Real closeness with God can only be received as a gift.  We prepare the ground, we ready ourselves through prayer and the commitments I have just mentioned, and then we wait - a bit like Mary really, waiting and pondering on the mystery that she chose to embrace with her wonderful "Let it be done to me..."  Every blessing to you, Angela.  Father Kevin

 

 

Dear Father:

I am a student of the Bible and read it daily.  Throughout the Bible it talks about God hating when we worship false gods or idols.  He is the only One to be worshipped.   Not saints or any other humans.  Why does the church have statues that we bow down to and why do they worship false idols?  I have a hard time believing the Bible is incorrect as it is the inspired word of GOD.  I stopped attending mass a year ago because I thought it was hypocritical to bow and pray to a statue even if that status was Jesus.  I pray to God through His Son Jesus and believe in my heart that is the only way to worship.  Am I wrong?  Thanks for your help, Sandy

Hi Sandy,

The Church is quite clear that we worship God and God alone. That is the teaching of the Bible and the Church's Tradition.  As Catholics we believe that God speaks not only through the Bible but also through the living Tradition of the Church.  A part of that tradition is that we honor members of our family who have lived the gospel well - sometimes we have statues or pictures of them to remind ourselves of their stories and inspire us.  We certainly do not worship them - but, we do admire them, remember them, pray to them and ask them to intercede for us, ask them to keep an eye on us, and so on.  This is not worship of the saints, but simply honoring those whom we admire for their living of the gospel.

I bet you have photo albums or collections of photos of people you admire and love. Perhaps you have posters at home, or photos of family and friends.  In same way, these statues are just the church's photo albums really.  I'd encourage you to join the community again and take the nourishment that only the Eucharist can offer us. 

We need to be a bit careful sometimes that we don't turn around and worship our own worshipping style and turn our back on the tradition that has been born of centuries of reflecting on God's Word.  This can be another form of idolatry.  Every good wish and blessing, Father Kevin



FATHER AMARO SAUMELL

 

Father:

Shortly after marrying my husband, I came to realize he was "asexual". I've been unhappy but have stayed with him for seven years because we have two children. Can I receive an annulment because of his asexuality even though we have had marital relations in the past? Michelle

Dear Michelle,

How did you arrive at such a conclusion?   Is there a possibility that there is some other reason that he has lost interest?   This does happen with many men and women, especially if something has surfaced in his mind that makes sexual expression repulsive to him.  Has he felt manipulated?   Was he ever sexually abused as a child?  There are so many different avenues to explore which would have nothing to do with being asexual.  But that is for an expert to explore.

Has your husband been to a doctor?   Obviously, because you do have two children, there is a possibility that sexuality has nothing to do with the current crisis.  What are your credentials for reaching such a diagnosis?  I think before this is discussed more deeply, and in order not to project something that I cannot be sure is true, the proper professionals should be consulted with.  Please encourage it.  God bless, Fr. Amaro

 

 

Father Amaro:

I have a friend who is a Christian and pastor of a non-denominational church- a person who exhibits a true closeness to God-a person of faith. I wanted to know from her what is it that makes a person so consecrated and so connected to God. She said that a person must have the anointing--consecrating him or herself to God and trusting Him. I study God's Word, I pray and do His will and try to really have God to be close to my soul. I believe that in Catholic terminology, the anointing is to let the Holy Spirit work in us that we may grow in our faith to follow His will. St. Dominic re-iterated that the more you know about God, the more you love Him. With me where is that closeness? - Angela

Dear Angela,

If you’re thinking that closeness to God is reduced to an emotional “warm fuzzy,” then you need to look at some of the saints such as Teresa of Avila and John of the Cross.  In our own day, we have had the witness of Mother Theresa who often felt abandoned.  But none of these went on their mere feelings to define their closeness.  Rather, they went by their conviction. For they knew that God was already close to us by the incarnation, nativity, passion, death, resurrection, and ascension of His Son.  They needed no more proof than that. They merely responded to it.  Hope this helps.   God bless, Fr. Amaro

 

 

Father:

Should I reverse my vasectomy?  My wife and I have two kids.  The youngest is 10.   We are 38.  We made the choice not to have more children five years ago, but I did not know my own heart then, or follow the Church as honestly, I am extremely sad to say.  I feel my wife does not want more children, but wants to help me.  I have talked to my parish priest, who affirms natural family planning, and says it is not too late, if my wife is open.  But my family is very stressed by this, and my wife is very scared and upset.  She says she will probably use birth control.  The procedure is expensive.  I am very, very emotionally torn.  I have been to confession, but I cannot forgive or accept myself, or say goodbye to the child-bearing part of my life.  Please help me.  - Glenn

Dear Glenn,

How sad that people in the world today are so drawn to mutilate the body that God gave them so that they may forgo the responsibilities and privileges of married life and family. Now that you’ve have discovered the gravity of sinfulness in that act, I believe that you’re coming to realize that the Holy Spirit has indeed protected the Church from error on the Sacrament of Matrimony and that Jesus never disappoints in His promise to be with us until the ends of the earth.

If your family is “very stressed” by your decision to restore God’s design, then you as the head of the house have the responsibility to learn, understand, and teach your family their faith. And why you would go through the procedure. You must explore the realities of conjugal life through God’s design and be able to explain it in an intelligible way. The only thing that artificial birth control has accomplished is bringing a maverick attitude of exploitation for personal pleasure to the marriage bed rather than planned sharing deliberately intended. And the problems have not confined themselves to the marriage bed. Now artificial (man made) birth control is perceived as a license to exploit and play at, bringing disease and even death to many.

You see, it is not merely the act of the vasectomy that has causes the damage, but also a clear message to others that sex is merely for sex’s sake. It might be your own children who receive this message as many do. It is a very frightening prospect.

NFP brings deliberation into sexuality. Rather than “impulse” or mere “spontaneity” as the mindless animals do, human beings can “intend.” They can plan. They are able to deliberate. They are able to show consideration because of love. That is precisely why the divorce rate of those who practice NFP is about 40% less than the national average. No one ever feels “used” and no one is ever a “toy.”

NFP has also been proven to even be more effective than condoms when planning a family, but is always open to God’s choice. If the technique is reversed, many couples who thought they were infertile have been able to conceive. But this is all done through consideration (being considerate) and planning.

In other words, if your wife is worried, tell her that she will no longer be a thing of impulse, but rather a person of care, choice, and deliberation.  Think about it. It makes sense.  God bless, Fr. Amaro

 

CATHOLICVIEW STAFF

 

CatholicView Staff:

If the different books of the New Testament are different apostles recounting of the life of Jesus, how is it possible that they can recount things that they were not present to witness?  For example: When Jesus prayed in the garden before He was taken by the Romans, all His apostles were asleep.  Even still they knew enough about how He prayed privately, while they slept, to recount it for us.  Or, when Jesus went off alone into the desert and was tempted by the devil, He was alone, yet someone knew enough of what went on to write it down.   How is that possible?  Also I would like to find more information on the origins of the bible: when it was written, who it was written by, where they got their information.  That would help clear up some fundamental issues of faith for me.  Thank you. – Jason

Jason: 

Yours is a very interesting question.  There are many things we as Christians MUST take on faith.   The scriptures tells us in Hebrews 11:1 that faith is “the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen”.  In this case we believe without having modern day proof or evidence because we know the bible is the inspired work of God. 

 The scriptures were written by human beings through what they understood was God's direction in their lives.  God used their experiences, their human sufferings and joys, their inspirations and dreams to write the Scripture and put into human words a divine and infinite truth:  God loves us and His thoughts are above our thoughts.  By faith and trust in Him alone, we have the strength to live each day and strive to make this world a better place through our ethical behavior and our active compassionate empathy for all who suffer. The Scriptures are not exact historical accounts as we know the science of history today.   Scriptures are eternal and spiritual truth taught to us by God through human experience.  God guided the writing of Scripture through time so that we can have a relationship with Him, a relationship with the Lord that saves us from our self-pity and loathing to full life in God's love.  Therefore, Scriptures are not an exact scientific history book, nor is it a science textbook explaining the HOW of created things; Scripture does, however, answer the deepest of human questions, WHY and WHERE DOES MY LIFE GO.  Scriptures are the Word of God and the textbook of true happiness and salvation through Jesus Christ our Lord.

As to your question about what the apostles heard in the garden and if they were asleep, how they knew that Jesus prayed to His Father and in what words He did, the apostles wrote about what they witnessed while they were in the company of Jesus Christ.  They had privileged information of all that Jesus taught.  Even though we cannot know if they wrote only what they heard before falling asleep (Luke 22:40-45), we must realize that Jesus after His resurrection from the dead (Easter morning) spent time with his apostles and disciples and explained to them in detail what happened in the garden, what happened on the way to Calvary, what happened when He died and went to free the dead, and what happened when He rose.  That is what they wrote about.  They wrote down the gospels some time after the death and resurrection of Jesus.  They wrote the stories down so that generations of believers could hear about Jesus from themselves.  Each had a different perspective that came with time, memory, and personal experience which explains why the gospels are similar and different at the same time, especially the gospel of John that is different from Matthew, Mark, and Luke.  In all this, the Holy Spirit was guiding the writers of the gospels so that we could know the truths that Jesus wanted us to know about His Father in heaven. 

As to your question about what the apostles heard in the garden and if they were asleep, how they knew that Jesus prayed to His Father and in what words He did, the apostles wrote about what they witnessed while they were in the company of Jesus Christ.  They had privileged information of all that Jesus taught.  Even though we cannot know if they wrote only what they heard before falling asleep (Luke 22:40-45), we must realize that Jesus after His resurrection from the dead (Easter morning) spent time with his apostles and disciples and explained to them in detail what happened in the garden, what happened on the way to Calvary, what happened when He died and went to free the dead, and what happened when He rose.  That is what they wrote about.  They wrote down the gospels some time after the death and resurrection of Jesus.  They wrote the stories down so that generations of believers could hear about Jesus from themselves.  Each had a different perspective that came with time, memory, and personal experience which explains why the gospels are similar and different at the same time, especially the gospel of John that is different from Matthew, Mark, and Luke.  In all this, the Holy Spirit was guiding the writers of the gospels so that we could know the truths that Jesus wanted us to know about His Father in heaven. 

It is good to look closely at your faith.  Ask God to strengthen you so that you understand the inspired scriptures by reading it through the eyes of faith.  Pray that the Lord will give you the clarity to be at peace with His Holy Word.  God’s blessings always in your quest for truth. -   CatholicView Staff

 

 

Hello,

I have a question that weighs heavily on me.   I have made many mistakes in my life including having a child out of wedlock and getting a divorce from the child's mother whom I eventually married.  There were issues of infidelity on her part and lack of communication on mine.  After the divorce it was determined that she suffered from bipolar disorder that probably caused the infidelity due to the mania.  She wanted to get back together with me and even became a Catholic, but I was very hurt and maybe too proud.  She died of a drug overdose 3 months ago.  I feel responsible because I didn't do my duties as a husband and Christian and help her when she needed it the most, instead of being angry.  I am so sorry for what has happened and realize how much I loved her, but it’s too late to tell her now.  I have trouble finding any kind of peace unless I can tell her how sorry I am, and know that she forgives me, but it’s too late.  I'm haunted everyday by the ramifications of what I've done or failed to do.  Is there any remedy?  Or must I wait for death to know if I've been forgiven and if she is in Heaven?  - Scott

Dear Scott:

What do you consider are the duties of a husband?  The first was to love as best you could.  God understands and knows ALL the details of your life, such as the conception of a child before marriage as well as the both of you trying to rectify the situation by eventual marriage.  Keep in mind you were not able to understand what bipolar disorder can do to a person, in your case causing the infidelity of your wife.  When stretched to the limit of your endurance, you reacted as most would.

Remember that Jesus reconciles and resolves all things to Himself and you must accept the Lord's forgiveness and apply that forgiveness to YOURSELF.  Continue your life with your precious child.  Move on to the present and the future for we cannot change the past.  We must learn from it, knowing that Christ understands all things and offers forgiveness through His saving blood and eternal grace. 

Some things are beyond human control.  The important thing is that your wife is FREE at last from the imprisonment of her bipolar disorder.  The Lord understands and knows what everyone has gone through for God's love is eternal.  Through your asking for peace through forgiveness, know that God has granted it.  Let this burden of unrest be lifted from your shoulders in the powerful name of Jesus Christ.  LET IT GO!   

May the Lord grant you the courage and the ability to get on with your life in His peace. - CatholicView Staff

 

 

CatholicView Staff:

I have a few questions. I am a Catholic, but my wife is not. We got married in a civil union 11 years ago. My wife was previously married to a man who was baptized Catholic, but never was a practicing Catholic adult.  My wife believes she was baptized in the Unitarian church as a child.  I have tried to research my situation, and have stumbled across the term "convalidation".  My ultimate goal is to have my marriage validated in the eyes of God and the Church. I do realize that my wife’s former marriage would need an annulment. I am a bit foggy on this procedure and the hopes of having a positive outcome or decision from it.  I was curious what type of time frame I would be looking at for the annulment procedure (hoping that one could be granted), and how long the process of getting a convalidation would take after that. I realize that there is no speedy way for any of this to happen.  But I do feel I require help in these matters.  

I would like to address another concern related to the above subject.  I understand that I do not receive communion, as I am
in a state of mortal sin. I accept this and understand it.   My other question is that of the sacrament of reconciliation.  Because I am in a state of mortal sin(un-validated marriage)am I unable to go to  confession? I am asking all of this because I
am concerned about my soul.  I do attend mass but often while there, I wonder if I should even be there, seeing as how I can’t receive sacraments.  I do enjoy going to mass for the most part, but have to wonder if God is shaking his head, wondering what I am doing there.  I hope my life serves some purpose, even in light of the fact that I am in trouble because of my marital situation.   I would like to thank you for taking the time to read this email, Father.  I appreciate it very much.  Sincerely, Glenn

Dear Glenn:

It is not clear whether your wife and ex-husband were married in the Church.  If so, your wife can easily receive a declaration that the Catholic party didn't receive the Sacrament of Marriage called LACK OF FORM.  It is easy to obtain and this could be done in a few days.   Then your marriage can be blessed in the church within the expected time of preparation that your diocese requires.  As to going to Mass and participating in the Sacrament of Penance (confession), God understands your situation and loves you with all His Divinity.  Continue your spiritual life in Jesus and talk to your pastor now!

May God bless you as you make your way on your journey of faith. - CatholicView Staff

 

 

CatholicViewStaff:

I want to ask about alleged activities of the late John Paul II.   I have been told that he allowed other non-Christian religions to perform their rituals in Catholic sanctuaries.    I have been told that John Paul II blessed Islam and other religions like Buddhism and stated they all worship the same God as Catholics.      Is there any credence to this or are people misunderstanding the late Pope's intention to reach out to other groups in the spirit of ecumenism.   Thanks for your time. – Bill

 Dear Bill:

Concerning the alleged activities of the late Pope John Paul II:

John Paul II always maintained communications with other Christian denominations and with non-Christian religious leaders.  During his pastorate, he annually called together religious leaders of all faiths together in Assisi in October (to coincide with the feast day of Saint Francis of Assisi which is October 4th) to pray for peace together.   He at no time ever "water-downed" the message that Jesus Christ is the Savior of ALL humankind and that the Church is the way to salvation in Jesus Christ.   There is no other Savior than Jesus.  There is no other truth than the gospel of Jesus Christ.  Pope John Paul II NEVER did anything contrary to this truth.   But nonetheless, God hears the prayers of all His creatures no matter what their religious beliefs.  At the same time, He calls the Church to tell the world the truth:  Jesus died and rose from the dead and salvation can only be had by our faith in Him.  I sincerely hope this helps.  God’s many blessings to you!   CatholicView Staff

 

 

CatholicView Staff:

I recently saw the film "Luther." It seems to me Luther had a legitimate concern over the corruption he found on a visit to Rome and the "selling of indulgendes." How does the present-day Catholic Church address his complaints? – Peter

Dear Peter:

Thank you for your valid letter concerning the film Luther".  Unfortunately we cannot look at the past human mistakes of our Church but must move on to the present and the future.   As to rectification for these past transgressions, we can only learn from them and seek God’s grace and forgiveness and the forgiveness of those the Church has harmed in every way possible. 

The Church is ever changing.  Why?  Because mankind is not perfect and is subject to the state of human imperfection and condition.  And we, as finite creatures, have made many wrong choices because of our limitations.  We must keep in mind the most important thing; that God’s word NEVER changes and He is all perfect and never makes a mistake.  This IS the basis of our faith.  God's truth is absolute and everlasting and can never be modified to suit whatever agenda we might pursue.  And so with this in mind we learn from our past errors, and ask pardon for them through our Heavenly Father Who is merciful and all forgiving.  Hope this helps a bit.  - CatholicView Staff

 

 

 CatholicView Staff:

I am a 49 year old male (never married). I learned 20 years ago that I have no sperm and therefore unable to have children. Since we are taught that the sole purpose of sexual intimacy is for procreation, does this mean I must abstain from sex my entire life?  - Paul

Dear Paul:

I am sorry that you cannot have children because of your physical problem.  However, this is not something you can change or modify.  God already knows this and wants you to have the joy and intimacy of marriage.  If you marry, there is no reason to abstain from the natural progression of love with a wife.  Obviously you must be frank and forthright with her beforehand about your lack of sperm to avoid later problems.  The sexual closeness you will share in marriage is a beautiful and precious union and is perfectly acceptable in God’s eyes.  May you find the love the Lord wants you to have.  Many blessings.  - CatholicView Staff

 

 

CatholicView Staff:

Good morning.  I have a straight forward enough question that has been a point of contention between my girlfriend and myself.  I'm sure you have answered this before: is a non-Catholic person allowed to be a Godparent?

Thanks for your time, Tom

 

Tom:

This letter is in answer to your question regarding non-Catholic Godparents.  Non-Catholic persons can only be witnesses at the Sacrament of Baptism in a Catholic Church and cannot serve as sponsors except in extreme cases.  Although non-Catholic persons might in every other respects be caring, loving individuals and faithful believers, Catholic God-Parents is the preferable standard the Catholic Church requires.  In good standing with the Church, they would signify that the child will be reared in the Catholic faith through first hand Catholic experience.  This law is to protect the child and further his faith.  It is the law of the Catholic Church.  However, in some unique and special circumstances a parish priest, after much determination, may allow a non-Catholic to step in as a Godparent.  I hope this helps. -  CatholicView.

 

 

CatholicView Staff:

I am 25 years old and I have completely fallen from the church. In fact all I do is put down God and blame him, I don't know what I have become. I am starting to believe that God has forgotten me. I am starting to feel deep down that Satan may be the man to help me. I don't know what to do. Every time I try to talk to God I feel hatred for him. I don't know why I hate God but I do. I have been through a lot as a child and I was abused physically and sexually and how come God never helped me then? Please don't tell me to pray or seek a therapist cause I have done all that and it doesn't work. I am starting to think that ending it might help. What should I do? What does God think I should do? I have completely separated myself from everything. I only leave my house to go to work.  I don't talk to girls like all my friends do and I don't go to clubs. I am alone. Please help me?  Brian

Dear Brian:

I am so sorry to hear that you have fallen away from the Church and God’s mercy.  Do know this is not unique as many people do blame God for the bad things that happen to them, only to later realize that only good things come from God; evil and bad things come from Satan.  What God does promise you is He will carry you through these bad times. 

You must change your focus.  Since you do not want to hear about prayer and seeing a GOOD spiritual or psychological counselor, you need to change that focus of seeing only the negative and begin to see the positive things in your life.  Try being with others who can encourage, inspire, and bring zest back into living.  And you must branch out from your house for it has become your PRISON.  

Sadly, if you cannot let go of the habit of being angry at the world, there will be no hope for you.  The only way to let go is to ask God to enter your heart and fill this void, filling the chasm that separates you from God’s goodness and love.  But you will have to do your part by making the decision to see the good with all its blessings instead of the bad things that have happened to you in the past.   The God Who created you can read your heart, understand your hatred, and will forgive you.  

If you see only the bad in your life, this will set the tone for you along with your bad attitude.  SEE the good things in your life and slowly make positive plans for yourself.  Pull yourself up by looking ahead to life, knowing that you are worth something, can be something, not by someone else’s standards but the one you set for YOU.  We cannot change the past but we can change the future.  It is now your turn!  May the Lord always be there with His mercy and love. - CatholicView Staff

 

 

CatholicView Staff:

My boyfriend and I have been going out for almost 2 years now and we have both agreed to wait until we are married to have sex.  However, I have heard many people talk about Dry Sex, which is basically having sex with your clothes on so to say.  My boyfriend and I are really in love, but is it against the church and God to participate in something such as dry sex?  Thank you.

 M:

It is a beautiful thing to be in love and I believe you know the answer to your question already.   Dry sex is still sex, except you are misusing the purpose of sex which is for the procreation of life.  Dry sex IS A SIN.

When you have strong feelings for another person it is sometimes difficult to wait for intimate relations.  Why not see your parish priest and tell him of your dilemma and see if you can move your marriage date to an earlier time?  God bless you both. - CatholicView Staff

 

 

CatholicView Staff:

I was confirmed, had my first communion, and was baptized in 1999. I also did one year of the RCIA classes prior to my confirmation. I was married in 1989 to a divorced gentleman,and we were not married in the Catholic church, nor is my husband catholic. We have been married for 16 years. I had never been married. I found out from a Deacon at my local parish, due to my spouse never having is marriage annulled that I should never been allowed to become a Catholic. I have been very faithful to the faith since my confirmation, but am very upset by this news. What does my husbands' former marriage have to do with me becoming a Catholic? He does not wish to become Catholic. – Joette

Joette:

It is understandable that you are upset by your situation.  Unfortunately you were given misleading information at your parish prior to your baptism and BEFORE becoming a Catholic.  But the good news is that it is not too late to see your parish priest so that you may sort these issues out.  I am sure that an annulment can be arrangement and your marriage then blessed by the church.

Please talk to your parish priest so these issues can be straightened out.   Hope this helps.  - CatholicView Staff

 

 

CatholicView:

My fiancée and I are getting married in Santa Barbara and we are residents of Redondo Beach and registered Catholics to the local church.  I'm being told that we are not allowed to marry in any of  the Santa Barbara catholic churches because we are not parish members.  It is very important for us to be married in the church.  Do you know what we would have to do to get special permission?  What sort of documents we have to provide?  The only reason we are getting married there, is because my fiancé's great Aunt who is 97 lives there and IS a parish member to that church.  Any help would be appreciated.  Thank you. Susan

Dear Susan:

In order to get married out of your parish you need to talk to the priest of the parish you have chosen.   Due to heavy scheduling of members seeking marriage in each parish, this might prove to be difficult.  Why not ask your 97 year old aunt to speak to her pastor on your behalf.   This will hopefully help you.  Best wishes on your marriage. -  CatholicView

 

 

CatholicView:

How is a catholic who has been called and gifted by our Father to cast out demons to do so in the Catholic church when he is not a priest?

Dear Brian:

Yours is an unusual talent.  One does not have to be a priest in order to use this talent but you will need to talk to a priest about your gift of casting out demons so he can assess your calling and guide you in the right direction.  God bless. – CatholicView Staff

 

 

 

 

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