A SKEPTIC TELLS HOW TO ESCAPE
BEING A CHRISTIAN FOREVER
Kathy Bernard - Publisher
Using a few rules of thumb, you can evade being a Christian forever. No one can make you be a Christian if you chose not to be. There is no law that forces this upon you. And if you feel you dont need Jesus Christ the Saviour, there are ways you can get around that. But first you must believe that people cannot make you change your lifestyle. We all know about free will; well you can use it and hide forever from those pious people who seem to be multiplying daily. You see Churches everywhere, and even on television you cannot escape. You know how Churches view people who do not want to accept Christ as Lord and Master. Heathens, they say. You are going to Hell in a handbasket, they decree. They are always trying to make the skeptic change. For the better, they insist. And Catholics are the worst, with their Holy rules and regulations and quiet mantles of guilt that they wear like armor in their daily lives.
First rule as a skeptic is, dont let those inner voices inside your heart make you feel guilty. Dont listen to them. Quiet them down, go to the movies or better yet, go dancing. Work up a little steam. Or get drunk, it helps. You can always count on being so "out of it" you fall in a deep troublefree sleep, almost as good as being in a coma. You cant hear anything from your conscience when you are really out cold. Also a good appetite can do wonders for escaping your troublesome thoughts. You can always lose the fat later. Perhaps try reading the latest book with lots of "good" parts in it.. Better still, simply turn up the volume a few notches on your television set to escape. Dont think and keep very busy. And car radios are a must these days for eluding your conscience because all you have to do is enjoy the music and watch out for the police who seem to be hiding everywhere with their ticket books at the ready.
Most importantly avoid Church like the plague. Dont be mislead into going with a well meaning friend and make no promises that you ever will go. Under no circumstance let a spouse or special man/woman try to drag you inside a church. If you have to attend a funeral, fine but concentrate only on the good times you spent with the deceased one, not on what the clergy is trying to say about eternity and all that nonsense. And dont let the Church music work on your mind. Remember this is all there was for that poor creature lying in that coffin and all you will have too. This is dangerous stuff and must not infiltrate your head. Weddings should be attended with the thought of how many divorces there are and how promises of forever are mostly broken in the end. Forever can sometimes mean a week or a few months at best.
Clergy will lie or say anything just to get you to open your wallets or purses. Pledging money is like throwing money away. Use it more wisely for vacations, going to exciting concerts, sports events, buying a round of drinks for your friends, or if you are married buy something for the spouse and the kids. Thats the way to go. Maybe put a few dollars in the bank. Churches get plenty of money from pious people who really enjoy giving money away. It is like throwing it in a deep dark pit which is usually some church persons pocket. So dont fall for sad tales in Church should you commit a "no no" and accidentally find yourself there. And if you cannot adhere to this belief add zippers to your pocket and those tiny padlocks, discreetly of course.
Should you find a Bible in the house left there by some well meaning relative, make sure you get rid of it. The Bible is nothing but trouble with its talk of eternal life and all the treasures you could have, all the blessings, the friendship with Jesus and God. All this talk of guardian angels and things like that, you must make sure to evade. Dont even open it lest you fall for some of the things you find within its covers. Some people out of curiosity have started reading the Bible and got caught up in the Christian web like the rest of those poor, sad creatures. You will never be the same should you get involved in reading this book. The Bible is potentially harmful to the skeptic as well as habit forming. Rule of thumb, don't read it.
Now, if you think you can handle this all by yourself, handle everything life deals to you without help, you are on your way to complete freedom. You will find more guidelines on your own as you go along. Anything you can think of which can keep you from being a Christian you might want to share with others. If you find yourself without money or friends, or you are sick and world weary, depend on yourself to fix things. You can do that. Sure you can. If a friend or a relative is dying, its no big deal that you cant handle by your lonesome. If you are lost, dispirited, discouraged and afraid, turn on your music, go on a cruise, buy yourself something, maybe jog a few miles and work off those pounds you gained by overeating. You dont need Jesus to take your hand and share your pain.
If your friends desert you at times like this, walk away from them and find new friends. Off with the old and on with the new. You dont require the warm comfort of the arms of Jesus around you. You dont want His Friendship when no one else wants you. You can make it. You dont need Him to mend your broken heart. You dont need His love and compassion. You dont need those promises of glory and peace. That is for sissies who are weak. You dont need His assurance of Salvation or His promise of Eternal life. You dont want Him to change your life and fill it with beauty. It is too much trouble to get to know Him. If there is a barren place within you, you must try to fill it with things; materialistic things or perhaps a new love who shares your views. When you think you cant go on, cant take another step, why ask Him to share the load? Does He even care? You can take care of it. Everything depends solely on you. You can manage. You can wipe away your own tears when life becomes hard. All you have to do is keep on going, keep on trudging uphill. You dont have to depend on Him to make a way for you when there is no way in front of you. You dont have to rely on Him at all. You can fight your way through life all by yourself.
You can, cant you?
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