ASK A PRIEST
MAY 2010



FATHER WILLIAM G. MENZEL
FATHER KEVIN BATES, SM
FATHER AMARO SAUMELL
CATHOLICVIEW STAFF


FATHER WILLIAM G. MENZEL

“How does the Church view implanting a birth control
device into a mentally incompetent woman?” - Dean

Father Bill:

How would the Church view a mentally incompetent woman being implanted with a birth control device?  The mental condition with which the woman is afflicted disrupts her cognitive abilities and lowers her inhibitions.  Complete surveillance and supervision are cost prohibitive and impractical. - Dean

 

Dear Dean:

First of all, I feel it’s necessary to clarify the question. This is more about de facto sterilization than it is about contraception. The idea is to somehow render a mentally incompetent woman incapable of conceiving a child. The method or means of doing that is not really relevant, as there are a number of ways it could be done. All of them would be contrary to the Church’s interpretation of the natural law.

Even civil society outside the purview of Catholic or Christian moral concerns is uncomfortably ambivalent about forced sterilization.  It opens up all sorts of questions like: Who decides?  What criteria are used to make the decision?  What does this say about how our society values individual rights?  It also raises the ugly specter of eugenics, with all the political, moral and scientific baggage that carries.

If it’s permitted to do this to a mentally incompetent woman, what about a mentally incompetent man?    Forced castration?  Forced vasectomy?  The ethical scenario gets pretty murky.

I’m not trying to ignore the very human dimensions of your question and the problem it poses, Dean.   These are not easy matters for society or for individuals looking for a compassionate solution to a matter of great concern.   It’s just that what in this case looks like a compassionate solution actually becomes a matter of even greater concern about the rights of individual human beings versus the purported best interests of society.

The Church does not find that the best interests of society are well served by the deprivation of basic human rights.

You ruled out one obvious solution to this dilemma.  Perhaps it needs to be reconsidered or other solutions sought.

Thank you for asking the question, Dean, and may God guide those who must find a way to help the woman of whom you write. - Father Bill

 
“What is the difference between confessing your sins to
a priest and confessing your sins directly to God?”
- Aileen

Father Bill:

Good day.  I just would like to ask what is the difference between confessing your sins to God in a prayer and confessing to the priest at Church?  If you ask forgiveness of your sins and felt sorry about it in a prayer, is it forgiven by God?   And do you still need to say those sins it in the sacrament of confession?

I'm really confused.  My first and last confession was when I was still in grade school.  I'm now in college. It's been 10 years already.  I've been longing to go to a confession but the priest for confession in church nearby our house is not always in and I'm also hesitant because I don't know what to say and how to say it.  I'm also afraid of how the priest will react.

I've been yearning to go to the confession but still up to now, I still haven't confessed.  I've been praying about this to Jesus Christ.  I hope and pray that Jesus Christ will use you to help me.  Thanks and God bless.  Aileen

 

Dear Aileen,

You are not alone!  There are many Catholics who have been away from the Sacrament of Penance for a long time.  Like you, they want to go back to it, but their anxieties tend to overpower the desire of their heart and soul.  I hope that I can make you—and maybe some other readers—less anxious.

However, let me begin by pointing out that you yourself have already answered the questions you posed in your first paragraph. You answered them in the paragraphs that followed. You know that there is something special about the Church’s sacraments that make them a big step beyond ordinary prayer. They’re both good and holy, but they are different. And, yes, God graciously forgives our sins as soon as we express contrition and a firm purpose to avoid sin in the future.

The Sacrament of Penance (Confession) is important, not because it is the only way that our sins can be forgiven, but because, like all the sacraments of the Church, it is a way that Jesus is present in a special way.  Jesus gave His disciples a very specific command that they were to forgive peoples’ sins. The Church continues to carry out this command in the Sacrament of Penance.  There the priest represents both the Church and the person of Jesus, and it is Jesus who reconciles us with the Father and with the Church.  You recognize these truths; that is why you hunger for the sacrament.  You are longing to encounter the real and healing presence of Jesus in this reconciling sacrament that He gave to his Church.

To put you at ease, I can assure you that the vast majority of priests will gladly help you make your confession.  If possible, try to ask around about what priests in your area are known to be compassionate confessors.   When you go, just explain to the priest right away that you haven’t done this since you were a child, and that you’re not even sure how to go about it.  He will welcome you, and give you all the help he can.

It’s also important to do a good examination of conscience ahead of time.  You’ll want to try your best, with God’s help, to remember the sins for which you seek forgiveness—especially any serious ones.  No one can remember everything, but be honest with yourself and with God.  Don’t worry about how the priest will react; if he’s a good confessor, he knows that he’s a sinner too.  He’s not going to get angry with you or shout out, “You did WHAT?”

You’ll also be expected to pray an act of contrition so that the priest can hear you pray it.  Since many people don’t have one memorized, most priests will have a copy of an act of contrition that you can read from.  You can also just pray one in your own words.  Something as simple as, “My God, be merciful to me a sinner” is as good an act of contrition as any.

So don’t be afraid, Aileen. Jesus is calling you, and you’re hearing him.  Get going.  God bless you. - Father Bill


“Is the existence of God simply a tool to make
us feel better?” - Tom

Father Bill:

I am 32 years old and been overcome by fear of our inevitable fate. I have studied many religious texts, read many books, and of course there is no good solution. Each religion offers an answer that, if true, would satisfy any human, but it requires belief. My mother taught me to question and investigate everything. I cannot rely on faith because I do not have it. How can you believe in something that could very well be a book written to make people feel better in a time of terrible pain. Is the existence of God simply a tool to help us feel better and cope with the inevitable? - Tom

 

Dear Tom,

Your question and observations are truly profound. Your mother taught you well and obviously helped you to develop an inquiring mind and a thirst for knowledge. Somewhere in that process of intellectual growth, you also acquired a strong need for certainty, and that is where I would like to begin to address your concerns. I think you might be closer to having faith than you actually realize.

As much as we might wish for certainty, the fact is that life is filled with uncertainties. People often fill those uncertainties with some kind of belief, whether you are a person of faith or not. We might begin with what may be the biggest uncertainty of all: How do I know that what I know is real? Some great movies have explored this theme from different perspectives. The Matrix and The Truman Show come to mind. Stories like these make an interesting point—one that you allude to in your question: Maybe the reality that we perceive and think we know has been constructed for us. Or—just maybe—we humans began with an erroneous assumption about reality and have made all our observations fit into it.

It has happened before—in primitive astronomy, for example, which assumed that the earth was the center of the universe.  All sorts of theories were formulated that helped to explain the motions of the sun, moon and planets, and those theories worked!  It wasn’t until new instruments of discovery were invented and put into use that the earth-centered, and later the sun-centered, explanations of the universe were put to rest, along with the theories that had made them plausible.  What if modern astronomy is still in a primitive state and we’re missing or awaiting some huge discovery that will drastically change how we view the universe?  We take it on faith that modern astronomers have made the correct assumptions and that their proven theories are accurate.  But can we be certain?

My point is this: Whether a person believes in a God or not, he still takes many things on faith and builds his life accordingly.  We take it on faith that our senses are accurate windows into the material world and that our brains are successful in interpreting the messages from our senses.  We know, too, that sometimes this intimate association between our senses and our brains can break down, a disassociation or disease that we call “mental illness”.  Many people with severe mental illness believe that they are perceiving the world as it is and believe that they are right and the rest of us are wrong.  Those of us who are not severely mentally ill take it on faith that it’s the other way around.

Maybe I’m playing a bit loose with the word “faith”, Tom, but I think that the intellectual sidetracks of history should make us at least a little wary of being too certain—and at least a little bit open to the fact that there are actually many things that we do believe—call it “faith” if you will—unless and until we have a better explanation.

So, is it possible that those of us who believe in God have, as you suggest, “simply [embraced] a tool to help us feel better and cope with the inevitable?” Sure, that’s possible. After all, it’s nice and comforting to believe in a just and benevolent God (Dorothy and her companions in the Wizard of Oz come to mind). It’s nice and comforting to believe in the possibility of an after-life where we will live in an eternal state of happiness. I’m not so sure about all of this as to totally eliminate the possibility of being wrong.  However—and this may surprise you—I’m more sure of this than I am that the scientific method always begins with the correct premises and comes to the correct conclusions. This is not a put-down of the scientific method by any means.  Its rigorous methods are well tested and I have no reason to doubt that the scientific analysis of our world is proceeding along the correct lines.  It’s just that I’m more sure of what I believe about God.

Your inquiry is so profound that I cannot hope to address everything contained in it.  However, I would like to conclude by addressing the concern you express in your first sentence.  You say that you have “been overcome by fear of our inevitable fate.”  I can’t help but wonder if your fear could possibly be God’s way of inviting you to take a deeper look at life and its meaning.  Your fear might actually be an emptiness that God is just waiting to fill.  One of the mantras of the Twelve Step Programs like Alcoholics Anonymous is, “Let go, and let God.”  Maybe God is inviting you to let go of your fears and accept a different kind of certainty than you’re accustomed to.

With a quick Google search, I found that the phrase “be not afraid” occurs 23 times in the King James Version of the bible.  I’m sure that variations of that same phrase would add quite a few more instances to the count.  Even most of us believers would have to admit to having some fears of “our inevitable fate”.  I know that I do.   Most of us tend to fear the unknown.  However, I do believe that there is a God who created this universe and created you and me, and I believe that this God loves us very much and that our “inevitable fate” is in His hands.  I believe that this is why “be not afraid” and its variations are found so often in the bible.  God wants to reassure us that our fate is in His hands, and those are the hands of love, not fear.  I fully understand if you can’t be as content with that as I am…but maybe you could give it a try. If not, I’ll understand.  - Father Bill




FATHER KEVIN BATES, SM


“Does it matter which bible translation I use?”
- Daliya

Father Kevin:

I like to use different Bible translations when I want to study a particular chapter or verse.  For example, I like to use an ESV study Bible often.  But my father seems to think that only Catholic translations should be used.   Does it even matter what translations we use?  Daliya

 

Hi Daliya:

I wouldn't get too excited about the translation questions.  Obviously our Catholic versions have been approved by the Church, but much Protestant Biblical scholarship is excellent and scholars work together across the traditions.  The RSV and the NRSV are very good - I use them myself quite often.  The NRSV especially is good as its language is more inclusive.  Our translators don't have a mortgage on the truth!  Good wishes. - Father Kevin

 
“With all the scandals and cover-ups, should I join the
Antiochian Orthodox Church?”  - Nick

Father Kevin:

It is difficult to remain a Roman Catholic with the revelations of sex abuse cover ups, and the Pope's involvement and his Nazi past.  I'd like to remain Catholic. Should I join the Antiochian Orthodox Church? - Nick

Hi Nick:

The choice is completely yours.   Certainly the scandals in the Church are very dispiriting for us all and we have to work hard to eliminate them, heal what wounds we can and become perhaps a smaller and certainly humbler church.  Leaving the Church, of course, is one option.   That happens in lots of families.  However in lots of families, people stick together, work through the issues and grow through the pain of their family's imperfections.  Like any other human community, our Church is full of imperfections just as each of us has our fair share of them.  Lots of us are working very hard to bring about healing and justice from within the Church.  It would be great if you could join us in this endeavor for the sake of all God's people and for the sake of the Gospel.  No other Church you might choose to join, should you choose to leave us, would be free from its own faults so you may be faced with the same dilemma once more.  Good wishes.   - Father Kevin

 
“God wants me to forgive but I do not feel it in my
heart.  How can I change this? – Sue

Father Kevin:

God wants me to love and forgive.   I profess it aloud but I don’t feel it in my heart.   Is there a way to change the way I feel?     -  Sue

 

Hi Sue:

We can't force our feelings to change, but we can change our attitudes and behaviors, and often enough after practicing more forgiving behaviors for instance, our feelings don't want to miss out and they will probably come along for the ride.  So I can act in a forgiving way and wait for my feelings to catch up. Sometimes our feelings won't change of course, but often enough they will.  Professing it out aloud is one thing, living it is where the real action is.  Every blessing to you, Sue. - Father Kevin





FATHER AMARO SAUMELL


"I suffer panic attacks when I attend Sunday Mass.
Is it a sin to watch Mass on my computer?" – Pam

Father Amaro:

I suffer from panic attacks at Sunday mass and am unable to concentrate on mass. I have been attending mass during the week and am able to fully concentrate on the mass. I say my prayers daily and the rosary. My question is, Is it ok to attend mass during the week and watch mass on the computer on Sunday? I am afraid to receive communion because I don't want to commit a sin. – Pam

 

Dear Pam,

Well, first things first! You didn’t say if you’ve seen a doctor about this problem.  This is important and you have a responsibility to cover all the bases.  Whether you’re able to "fully concentrate" on the mass is no problem as long as you know that you are really and earnestly doing the best you can.  God understands what you are going through.

Many times these panic attacks can be alleviated by just sitting in an isolated part of the Church.  Talk to your pastor about this, so he doesn’t think you’re just being unsociable.  Then, receive the Blessed Sacrament in good conscience.  Hope this helps you. -  God bless, Father Amaro


"Were the Nephilim (Genesis 6) offspring of angels
or men?" - Michelle

Father Amaro:

Were the Nephilim (Genesis 6) offspring of angels or men? I read a novel Angelology by Trussoni and it peaked my interest. Thanks. Michelle

 

Dear Michelle,

Be careful of novels. Look at all the confusion of the "Da Vinci Code." Novels are just that... novels, full of fiction and mythology. You’ll find through research and just plan common sense that the Nephilim were rather large people. They were warriors and very strong. The term "sons of god" were a colloquialism just as we might use today. It doesn’t mean sons of the Living God as we know Him.

The same goes for reading various theologies.  To be a "theologian" does not require faith.  I could be a Buddhist theologian and not believe in the religion.

The Holy Spirit doesn’t teach through novels or theologies. He teaches through the faith. Stick with the Catechism and the Sacraments. That will lead you spiritually to where you need to go. As St. Paul says, there will always be those things that "tickle the ears." Those are some of Satan’s greatest tools to distract someone from salvation.  God bless, Father Amaro


"My boyfriend wants his pastor from his Church
to be a part of my Catholic wedding.  How can
I compromise?" - Stephanie

Father Amaro:

I love my Catholic Church and want to be married there, but my boyfriend wants his pastor from his Christian Church to be part of our marriage. What can I do to compromise? – Stephanie

Dear Stephanie,

It is very common to have the pastor from another church be part of a wedding ceremony.  Please consider though, what it will be like when children come along and wonder why your husband goes to a different church.  

Interfaith marriages can often create a very confusing environment for children.  If this is a problem now, it could be very detrimental toward the future if you’re serious about how children are to be raised.  Think carefully. No matter how much you love someone, is God coming first?  God bless, Father Amaro

 
"My Catholic wife never had her first marriage annulled. 
How can I receive communion?" Mauricio

Father Amaro:

I was away from the Holy Church for more than 20 years. In the meantime I married a Catholic who never had her first marriage annulled by the Church. I have been regularly attending mass every Sunday for almost a year now. My wife has stopped going to Church and is for all intents and purposes non-practicing. How can I receive communion? - Mauricio

 

Dear Mauricio,

If your wife’s first marriage has not been annulled, it means that she is still married to her first husband. An annulment means that a marriage never took place in the first place. There might have been a "ceremony," but it was never representative of a reality.

In the meantime, you obtained a "civil contract" having nothing to do with our relationship with God.  It isn’t real marriage because there are also human laws to dissolve a marriage.  Real marriage, as God has provided, is permanent.

Sadly, because you have entered into this civil arrangement with a married woman, you have placed yourselves in a state of adultery, a very serious sin. You should not receive the Body and Blood of Christ until this is resolved.  Your wife needs to speak to the priest about getting an annulment from her first marriage and have yours blessed by the Church.

We suggest that you and your wife go speak to the priest as soon as possible about resolving this issue so you both can move forward in your faith.  God bless you. -  Father Amaro

 
"I’m in love with a Muslim girl. How can I get her
to see the truth of the Catholic Church?" - Patrick

Father Amaro:

I'm in love with a liberal almost no practicing Muslim girl and I’m not willing to convert to Islam, because I know my religion and I’m proud, happy and confident about the Catholic faith. What is the best way to convince her about the truth of Catholic Church? What should I say to her? - Patrick

 

Dear Patrick:

People often fall in love. That does not mean that one always falls in love with one whom pleases God.   People fall in love many times during their lives.

You need to think about this very carefully.  As in another question above, you will likely have children.  This creates a very confusing environment for children.  Interfaith marriages are a very delicate situation and often end in tragedy because the children cling to no faith eventually.  (What’s ok for mom is ok with me.)

There is no "best way" to convert anyone.  Conversion takes place in the heart after being exposed to the truth.  You might suggest that she participate in the Inquiry stage of RCIA, which does not obligate anyone to convert, but simply states our case.  If that doesn’t work, I would consider if this is truly who God intends for you, regardless of your emotional attachment.  Going into a relationship that could fail is a declaration that you will eventually want someone else to raise your children because if divorce is in the future, that is what will happen.  You are talking about an event that will impact the rest of your life.  Pray heavily on it.  God bless, Father Amaro

 
CATHOLICVIEW STAFF

Why do some Catholics think it is the Church that
saves them?” - Linda

CatholicView Staff:

I just want to know why some Catholics feel it is the Church that saves when we know Jesus Christ is our Savior?  Thank you for your time.  - Linda

 

Dear Linda:

Linda, you are absolutely right!  The Catholic Church does not save anyone.  The testimony of the Gospels makes it quite clear that only through Jesus Christ can a person enter the Kingdom of Heaven.  The Church is instrumental in teaching us the way, giving us the sacraments, and keeping us on God’s path.  It is through the Church that we are taught God's Word.   It is through the Church that we share the Body and Blood of our Savior Jesus Christ, and all the sacraments that sustain our Christian life.  The Church is a family of believers who share with each other in fellowship, finding a special comfort when we come together on the Sabbath and share the body of Christ.

In John 10:7-9, Jesus tells us, “Amen, amen, I say to you, I am the gate for the sheep. All who came [before Me] are thieves and robbers, but the sheep did not listen to them. I am the gate. Whoever enters through Me will be saved, and will come in and go out and find pasture. . . .” And in John 14:6 it reads,  “”I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.”  The bible also states, Whoever believes and is baptized will be saved; whoever does not believe will be condemned.  - Mark 16:16

And so, it is the belief in Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior Who alone can save.  No person, living or dead can do this. 

Hope this helps you.  Keep moving on God’s path, praying for God to keep you searching for truth.  God bless you.  CatholicView Staff


“How do I know I am saved when I die?”
- Robert

CatholicView Staff:

What must I do in order to know that I will go to Heaven/be saved when I die?  Thank you. - Robert

 

Robert:    

CatholicView received a similar question last month concerning salvation.  On Sunday, February 21, 2010 in the second reading at Mass,  Romans 10:8-13 clarifies and answers your question concerning salvation:

It reads, “The message is very close at hand; it is on your lips and in your heart.  And that message is the very message about faith that we preach: If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is by believing in your heart that you are made right with God, and it is by confessing with your mouth that you are saved. As the Scriptures tell us, “Anyone who trusts in Him will never be disgraced.   Jew and Gentile are the same in this respect.They have the same Lord, who gives generously to all who call on him. For “Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.”  And so, Martin, there you have your assurance. Your place in heaven is assured by faith and by the death and resurrection of the Lord.  The Lord Jesus didn't die and rise in vain.  He is taking you with him.

But, along with this good news for those who profess their faith, we must also remember scriptures that warn: 

Mark 13:33 states, “And since you don’t know when that time will come, be on guard! Stay alert.”  St. Mark is warning us that we must repent of any sin we commit, and ask and receive forgiveness immediately, and with confidence.

Continue to go forward in your faith, knowing that no man is perfect. God knows this and made away for us when we stumble into sin. We, as Christians, have on our side the most important antidote for sin; it is the grace God gives us to constantly to renew our faith in Jesus Christ by seeking forgiveness. His promises are eternal, and through His Son, we can remain on God's path to eternal life.  And His promises to me will be kept to the full. I have no doubt and I am ready to see my "mansion" in heaven (John14:1-2). And I am quite sure that I see your mansion with your name on it!  We shall see you in heaven, my friend. - CatholicView Staff


“Is there a midpoint between Mortal and venial sin?”
- Liz

CatholicView Staff:

My teacher told me there is a midpoint between mortal and venial sin.  I don't understand what it would be, such as what defines this 'midpoint?'  If there are any examples or definition that would help me further understand this concept I would greatly appreciate it!  Thank you!! - Liz

 

Liz:

There is an Featured Answer to mortal sin in CatholicView entitled  Mortal Sin.   Please use this preceding link to find your answer.   You can also access this answer on Mortal Sin at the beginning page of the site:  catholicview.org . 

God bless you in your quest for truth. – CatholicView Staff


I am thinking of playing a game called Oujia Board. 
Is this dangerous?” - Onfire

 CatholicView Staff:

 I was thinking of playing this game called a oujia board and I was wondering if it bad to believe and or play this game and is it dangerous?  Thank you. - Onfire

 

Hello Onfire:

A believing Christian must never use them.  Make no mistake about Ouija Boards. Those who do use them show a total lack of trust in God by turning to the occult through the use of the Ouija board for answers.  As Christians we must understand that the Ouija board comes from the sources of evil.  When a person tries to receive answers to life through means not associated with our faith in Jesus Christ, we open ourselves to the intervention of evil.  This is why divination is sinful.  We are, in truth calling upon the demons of Satan to supply answers to our problems, and are deliberately choosing the forces of hell that will harm our friendship with God.  

Jesus tells us not to worry about our future but to place ourselves in His care.  Using a Ouija board opens us up to a world of spirits we cannot see and whose origin we don't know about.  There are only two places spirits come from and that is either from heaven or hell.  We know God speaks to the heart through the Holy Spirit.  Even though one considers it a harmless game, it can open the door to demonic invasion and the malicious influences of evil spirits and should be avoided at all costs.

Contacting spirits through methods other than prayer to God removes us from His protection. Without God, we are left completely unprepared for what can happen to us because of dabbling in the occult.

Scriptural passages that specifically condemn or denigrate divination and related occultic activities include 1 Samuel 15:23-2, Kings 17:17, 2 Chronicles. 33:6, Isaiah 8:19-20, Jeremiah.14:14, 27:9-10; 29:8-9, Ezekiel.12:24; and Galatians 5:19-21.Deuteronomy 18:10, Jeremiah 29:8, and Leviticus 19:26-31;20:6-27).

Our loving Father in heaven warns us of these dangers for our protection and well being, both spiritual and physical. Let us pray that those who, unaware of the dangers, are involved with divination will soon realize that this "mere game" can be the gravest risk and the greatest gamble of their lives.   CatholicView Staff


“I want to take communion but my husband needs an
annulment from his first wife.  Can you help me?” - Pura

CatholicView Staff:

I have been married for over 15 years and before I got married I went to church and received Holy Communion regularly.  Now we still go to church but I could not receive communion because we were not married in a Catholic church.  Reason for that is because my husband was married before and filed for divorce in 1982.  How can I go back to receiving holy communion every Sunday and during holidays?  Please help me Father.  Thank you and God Bless you always! - Pura

 

Dear Pura:

I am sorry to learn that you married your husband without his receiving an annulment from his first marriage.

There is a way that this can be changed and will allow you to receive communion.  Your husband must talk to the parish priest about getting an annulment because your husband is still married to his first wife in the eyes of the Church.  And so, you and your husband are living in adultery until this document is obtained.

Please go to see your parish priest and remember to bring any papers pertaining to the marriage, etc.  This way the priest can apply for the annulment and you will be on your way to gaining it.   Once all details are taken care of, you will be able to receive communion and be re-instated as part of the Church family.

Have courage.  There is light at the end of this tunnel.  God bless you.    CatholicView Staff

 
“Is there hoodoo or voodoo in my home?” - Lavada

CatholicView Staff:

I've recently moved into a new home, over the door sills are crosses painted with dark red polish or blood.   Looks like it was finger painted on.  What does this mean?  I don't sense any evil presence, nor are there any odd activities here.  Is this a blessing or curse, or some Wicca rite?  I’m a Christian, contacted several churches and so far have not received a response.  Could it be based on passover?  I don't want any hoo-doo or voo-doo in my home.  Please help with this it just upsets me to think it may not be based on Christ.  They are painted upright not upside down, if that helps...    Thanks for your time.   Lavada

 

Dear Lavada: 

I am so sorry that you are anxious concerning the crosses on the doorsills of your new home.  I am assuming the markings were not there when you looked at the house.

There are many possibilities.  The first that comes to mind is perhaps some teenagers may have gained entry and thought it was a good joke to play.  Nevertheless, my suggestion is that you replace the sills, or less expensively remove the drawings with paint remover or some other solvent.  A sanding machine will also work just as well.

You are a Christian woman.  No evil is bigger or more powerful than the God you serve.  He wants you to enjoy your new home and not live in a fear and anxiety. 

Please ask your pastor to come and bless your new home.  In the meantime, when you are nervous and uneasy, walk through each room and say a small prayer, asking God to cleanse the room of all iniquities, to send His angels of mercy to protect you, and that He, in His loving mercy, restore your peace.     

Do not be afraid.  May God keep you in the palm of His Hand, bringing the peace only He can give.   - CatholicView Staff

 
“I get attacked in Chat Rooms for not defending the
Church.   What should I say?” - Pam

CatholicView Staff:

In a chat room some Catholics try to force Church on others, then some attack the Church, some one brings up Mary... I say "this is not about Church ..this is about God, and Jesus, and Him crucified for us, rose and ascended into Heaven", and I get attacked by the Catholics for not defending our Church or Mary .  Please pray for me if you can’t answer this, and send the Pope lol. thanks Pam... born and raised Catholic.

 

Dear Pam:

You are absolutely right.  Your faith is about our Lord, Jesus Christ and our heavenly Father.  You do not need a defense for those who cannot understand what it is to be a true Christian Catholic.  No one can force a person to believe.  They must sincerely want to have God in their lives and willingly accept the gift of salvation that Jesus Christ died to give us all.

Pam, I know that the Lord is well pleased with you.  Keep moving forward in your faith.   Let His light shine through your actions and your belief in Christ.   I will pray that the Lord continues to strengthen your faith and give you His peace.  God bless you. - CatholicView Staff

 
“I am concerned that I have not been forgiven though
I went to confession.   What shall I do?” - Jim

CatholicView Staff:

I committed sins as a teen and did not confess them during reconciliation but confessed them as an adult a number of times.  I am worried that I have not confessed them fully or been forgiven.   – Jim

 

Jim:

Do not be concerned.  God knows everything you do and He knows you have sought forgiveness.  He knows you are trying to do the right thing.   Please pray, asking the Lord to forgive you for any past sin that is bothering you.  He hears each and every prayer.  God wants you to move forward now with faith, knowing this burden of sin has already been lifted from your shoulders.  Yes, He has already forgiven you. 

Stay away from sin in the future, and be at peace, going forth to love and serve the Lord.  God bless you. - CatholicView Staff

 
“What happens to babies or aborted babies who die?”
- Michelle

CatholicView Staff:

What happens to babies or aborted babies who die?  Are they adults in heaven? Do they become cherubs? – Michelle

 

Michelle:

There is no official Church teaching of this matter.   Although the Church has made no formal pronouncement on the subject, it is generally believed that the unborn or aborted souls rest in the mercy of God.    Because God is a loving Father, it is my belief that these babies, unborn without the stain of sin, are too young to choose for themselves.   They are therefore innocent of earthly sin and will live with God in the after life.  God is loving, merciful, and just. I can't imagine him banishing innocent babies from His kingdom. -  CatholicView Staff

 
"My mother spent the weekend with an ex-priest. 
How is this okay?” - Susan

CatholicView Staff:

My mother and father were married 40 years.  Recently my mom went away for a weekend with an ex-priest and they slept together.   She said everything was ok because they weren't having sex.    How is that ok? - Susan

 

Susan:

You are absolutely right in saying that these actions are not okay.   You mother has set a very poor example for her children. 

You neglect to say if your mother is still married.  Nonetheless, spending the weekend with any man is wrong and certainly the ex-priest would know this.  The impropriety of their actions is an occasion of sin.

Hope this helps.  - CatholicView Staff

 
“Why do I get the opposite of what I ask God for?”
- Kelly

CatholicView Staff:

I’m always asking God for things but its almost like I get the opposite of what I ask for...where is God When I desperately need Him?  Am I doing something wrong when praying? Do I have to pray the rosary but can I speak directly to Him? Please help me.  I'm feeling very depressed.  Thanks. -  Kelly

 

Dear Kelly:

I am so sorry to hear that you are depressed. 

Realize is that God has a reason for not giving the things you ask for.  You must trust His wisdom and have patience.   God answers ALL prayer, but sometimes the answer is "no", sometimes it is "not yet", and other times the answer is "yes".

We do not know why God answers prayers in different ways except that He, being all all-wise and all-knowing, is aware of what is the best for us – and sometimes that is to answer a prayer in the negative.  But He hears each and every prayer. 

You ask if you can pray directly to God.   Of course you can pray directly to Him.  He wants to hear about anything that is troubling you.  In John 14:13,  Jesus Christ tells us “You can ask for anything in my name, and I will do it, so that the Son can bring glory to the Father”. 

God does not always grant what you think you want or need.  Let that judgment be made by Him, for some things are not good for us.   Our faith grows by being exercised, and faith is not exercised when we receive everything we want (or think we need). What faith is required when God becomes a Santa Claus – giving presents to all? It takes no faith to simply receive presents (“miracles”) but it takes great faith to believe when you don’t get everything you want, when you trust God completely knowing He is doing the very best for you in all areas of your life. That is what strengthens faith.

Kelly, you are loved.  Know that the Lord is with you, and whatever it is that you want will be granted if He thinks it is right for you.  Have patience and wait upon the Lord.  Keep praying and moving forward in faith.  Hope this helps a bit. – CatholicView Staff

 
“Am I doing the wrong thing by living with my girlfriend?”
- Neil

CatholicView Staff:

My girlfriend is moving in with me very shortly, I planned to at least be engaged before living with my partner.   I haven’t had a chance to find the right situation yet.  Does this mean that I am doing the wrong thing by living with her?  - Neil

 

Dear Neil:

I think you know already that you would be living in the sin of fornication.  If you do, you are not entitled to the Sacraments of the Church.   See your priest to discuss this fully.   CatholicView Staff

 
“I am pregnant but do not feel bonded to my baby. 
Why doesn’t God help me?” - Me

CatholicView Staff:

I am 28 weeks pregnant; a result from my honeymoon.   My problem is, I do not feel connected or bonded to this baby at all.  To be honest, I really do not want the baby. I feel like a horrible person.  I pray to God everyday to help me but nothing changes.  I am terribly depressed and seeing a therapist (not much help). My question is, why doesn't God help me at all with my fears/depression etc.  Most women do not feel this way when pregnant.  I dread giving birth and taking care of a screaming baby who I secretly do not want.  It’s horrible having to fake being excited to others about this.  I truly feel like this is a nightmare I am living in.  Why doesn't God help me? - Me

 

Me:

I am so sorry to hear that you are depressed about your pregnancy.  And, for some it is scary, but I praise you for asking for God’s help through prayer.  Know that the Lord Who loves you understands and is even now with you, strengthening and urging you to get more help on this issue.

God knows all you are facing and He does hear your plea for help.   When you pray, ask Him to give you the courage to overcome your depression.  Sit silently and listen for His Voice granting you fortitude to move ahead to that beautiful child and the joy it will bring into your life.  You will find that the rewards of undeniable love and pride will be so great it will overshadow all pain and sacrifice. 

You are a believing Christian Catholic.  Through the grace of God, you are strong.  You are not alone in this for Jesus Christ Whom you worship is walking right along with you today and always, helping you carry the load of fears and depression.  He promised never to leave you stranded and afraid.  He does not lie.

I am going to pray for you now and I ask that you say a simple prayer each time you feel isolated, depressed, and fearful.  Watch the Lord come through for you as no one else can, for He is your Heavenly Father Who loves you, Who wants you to be happy and accepting of that little human being He is giving to your care:

Dear God in heaven, I implore You to open Me’s heart.  Let her depression flee from her.   Replace it with anticipation for the days ahead.  Let her see the gift of new life you have chosen to give and let her be at peace with this honor.  Touch her spirit and lift her up.  Put joy in her heart for the here and now.  Let her remember Mary, the mother of Jesus who accepted God’s decree for her life, even though she was unmarried at that time.  She, too, was afraid but she moved forward in faith.  Let Me see ahead to the moment when her beautiful child will be placed within her arms.  God, You have a plan for Me's life, and You will make known that plan in Your own time.  Let her continue in hope, let her know that You will never leave her to despair, for You love her.  I pray that You will show her Your love and compassion, because she desperately needs to feel it is there.  We ask all this in the name of Your Son, Jesus Christ.”

Now Me, I want you to try to get a professional Catholic Psychiatrist to help you.  Someone who believes in God as you do and will be able to help you with experienced and Christ like understanding .    Your priest will be able to help you find someone.  I will pray for you, knowing that the God you and I serve will NEVER let you down.  And so, when doubts and fears set in, say this simple prayer or one of your choosing:

“Dear God, I ask you to help me accept this precious gift of life You have chosen to give to me.  I am so afraid and depressed.  Give me the peace that only You can give.  I offer this prayer in the name of Your Son Jesus Christ.  Amen”.

I will continue to add my prayers to yours for God’s healing.  God bless you. - CatholicView Staff

 
"Is there no such thing as shame anymore? 
What are we to do?” - Beverly

Dear Catholic View Staff, 

I didn't know how to post the following in the "Ask A Priest" segment and I couldn't find if this subject had been asked or not.    When I grew up, I was very sheltered (innocent), thanks be to God and my parents.  I recently viewed Christina Aguilera's newest video "Not Myself Tonight" on the computer the other day to see what all the hype was about.   OMGosh, it was like a porn musical.  It was all about bondage (same sex, sex), a part where she says, "I'm not the same girl and if you don't like it, f**k you" with a hand gesture.  There was also a part near the end that was so sacrilegious because even though the dancers were dressed, it looked like an orgie in a church (or at least it gave the appearence of one with stained glass windows.)   Does she not realize that children might be able to see this?  This really upset me.  Is there no such thing as shame anymore?  What are we to do?  Thank you for any help with this. 

Sincerely, Beverly

 

Dear Beverly:

Talk to the young in your family.  Spread the news if you can about this video by Christina Aquilera.  Pray that God will intervene.

Unfortunately the world has changed and some things are moving rapidly and fulfilling bible prophecy.   This DOES NOT mean the end is near, for only God knows this.  Jesus Christ Himself told us in the scriptures that no one but the Father know when the end will come.

All we can do is pray that God changes the hearts of those who sin against Him. – CatholicView Staff

 
"I told my husband if I die first not to marry a certain
woman.  Have I sinned?" - Jessica

CatholicView Staff:

I love my husband very much and he loves me as well.  One day I asked him that if I ever die, I don’t want him to remarry a certain woman who dislikes me and has treated me bad.  I asked this as a favor of him and he said yes and that it wouldn’t be a problem.  Have I sinned with this request?  I know this is a very strange question but I need an answer in order to relieve my conscience.  – Jessica

 

Dear Jessica:

No, Jessica, you have not sinned with this request.  And I can certainly understand your human feelings.  And perhaps you feel this strongly because of how you say this woman treated you.

You do not make clear whether this lady was your husband’s first wife or just a woman your husband knows and admires.  But be aware that if this person is his ex-wife she may feel badly that the husband she loved at one time (or still does) and maybe even had children together, would have strong feelings against her replacement.  This is a human response to the pain of loss.  However, if the woman is simply someone whom you both know and you see that she has feelings for your husband and is perhaps envious of your position as wife, then it is natural for you to feel possessive and protective.   Sadly, your letter does not explain many things.

Those who marry will usually not want their mates to live in sadness but hope they will find happiness once again.  Once we die, we throw off the mantle of such feeling you are experiencing.  These things are no longer of consequence, for they are earthly.   If you know your husband is a good and faithful spouse, feel secure in this for you are bound to each other in this life with love. 

Your husband has honored your promise.  The future remains the future and only God knows it.  The Lord understands.  You did not sin.   Be very happy for the love of your husband.  Go forth in peace and love.  CatholicView Staff

 
If God forgave me for sins committed against my friends,
do I have to make amends to those friends too?” - Erich

CatholicView Staff:

If I go to confession and confess my sins for those committed against my friends is it wrong for me to view my friends as un-christian for expecting me to make amends with them if God has already forgiven me? – Erich

 

Erich:

Thank you for your interesting email. 

As a Christian, you are expected to forgive those who have hurt you in the past.  As God as forgiven you, you must forgive them.  Read Matthew 6: 14 - 15 that reads: “If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you.  But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins.

This is your answer.  Hope this helps.  God go with you, Erich.  CatholicView Staff

 
“I smoke and snus because I have a minor case of ADD. 
Is this s sin?” John

CatholicView Staff:

I smoke and snus because I have a minor case of ADD and it allows me to put my more theoretical thoughts into words, is it a sin? - John

 

John:

As I understand it, snus is a moist powder tobacco product originated from a variant of dry snuff in the early 19th century in Sweden, consumed by placing it under the lip for extended periods. 

John, it isn’t a sin per se, but overindulgence in anything that is harmful to your body is frowned upon.  The reason?  God has asked us to take care of our bodies, always knowing that it is a temple for the soul.   Your body is given to you for safekeeping, not for purposely destroying it.  If you know a habit is destructive to your body, give it up.  It is better that you give it up than suffer the pains of cancer or lung disease.

You say you have a minor case of Attention Deficit Disorder or ADD.  Are you under the supervision of a doctor?  This is important!  God knows what you are going through with your health.  At the same time, you must take care of your body.  I would advise that you stop your habit of using snus to put theoretical thoughts into words.

Please consult with your priest and ask him to advise you.  God bless. – CatholicView Staff  

 
“Is it true that the New Testament is the property of
the Catholic Church?” - Howard

CatholicView Staff:

A Methodist pastor stated that the New Testament was the property of the Catholic church, and therefore the Catholic Church has sole authority to interpret that book. Is the New Testament the property of the Catholic Church?  - Howard

 

Howard:

This Methodist minister is wrong.  The New Testament is not the sole property of the Catholic Church.    The New Testament was written for every person for it is the account of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and those apostles and believers who came after Him.  It is open to any race, creed, or religion and all people who want to read about the salvation Jesus Christ is offering even today as a free gift, and what God wants us to know.  The New Testament is built on the foundation of the Old Testament where it is foretold that Christ would come.  (read Isaiah 53 for starters) 

No man owns truth.  Truth is for all believers regardless of denomination.  The Methodist minister is wrong.  God go with you.   CatholicView Staff

 
“I was betrayed by two people and cannot get past this. 
What shall I do?” - Jeffrey

CatholicView Staff:

A little over a year ago, I was in a situation where I was essentially betrayed by a couple of individuals whose opinions actually meant something to me.  The situation has left me hurt, humiliated, angry and, lately, wishing to exact some sort of revenge.  The thoughts of revenge are something that I will most likely not pursue (Never say “never”), but it occupies my thoughts constantly in increasing intervals.

The problem is that I want to forgive, forget and move on, yet my thoughts will not let me.  I pray morning and evening (Liturgy of the Hours), read “inspirational” books and, recently, Bernadette Soubirous has replaced Francis of Assisi as my hero because of her passive attitude toward suffering and humiliation.

As it is, while thoughts of suicide no longer dominate my thinking, I am constantly a very angry man and my wife is feeling the effects of this.  I need to “get over it” and move on, but this is easier said than done.  Not to mention the fact that, as a Christian, I need to forgive.  Suggestions?   Jeffrey

 

Jeffrey:

I am so sorry to hear that you are suffering from the betrayal of your friends.   And I am assuming that these people who hurt you are not a physical danger for you.  This is a very important point that you must consider.

Betrayal is something that is very hard to get past because your trust has been violated.  But now it is time to move on with your life.  Your friends’ actions must not dictate who you are, and you must not let their betrayal shape your life or your marriage.  As painful as it is, you must get out of this web. 

Remember the betrayal of Jesus Christ by Judas who led the soldiers to Jesus.  Sadly, Judas had been one of His own. 

You must move forward now.  You have suffered because of these two people whom you held in high regard, and whose opinions you accepted.  You have over-rated their value to the point where you have permitted their summations and their belief to overshadow the most important point:  the worth that God and His Son Jesus Christ have placed in you. 

In God’s eyes, no man is more valuable than you.  Every person that the Lord has created is important.    God tells us to love our neighbors and our friends.  These people who hurt you broke this commandment.  Those who hurt others will have to stand in judgment someday. 

But now is the time to look ahead and not let other human beings stand taller than you.  You are God’s precious and valuable commodity just like them, so much so that you, as a Christian, will one day be accepted into eternal heaven.  And this will be the ultimate joy.  In the meantime, God wants you to find peace.  He wants you to turn life’s pages and "finish the book" in peace.

Resist the need for revenge, as it will avail you NOTHING.    Satan would like that.  Yes, this is a tough situation, yes, it is a hurtful and mean thing to be betrayed by those you trust, but there is a way to cleanse yourself by doing the very thing that will make those who persecuted you feel ashamed.  FORGIVE THEM!  Tell them you forgive them and then free yourself into the waiting and loving arms of our Savior, Jesus Christ.  He will wipe away all your tears and you will be the one to stand tall because you will have done the very thing God commanded, “Forgave those who trespassed against you.”

Do not carry this heavy burden any longer.  Release it by doing this one thing those who hurt you will not expect:   FORGIVENESS!  Asking Jesus Christ for courage, say to them “I forgive you for the hurt you have caused me” and walk away with your head held high.  You must not expect ANYTHING in return; no apology and no words.  But God, Who sees all things will be standing by seeing it all and will bless you abundantly.

Be confident! 

Give this hurt to the Lord.  Nothing is insurmountable for our Father.  Be patient and go forth now, knowing that the Lord will heal all your wounds in His own time.   Please know that CatholicView will be praying for you.  CatholicView Staff

 
“I have never been baptized, attended mass, but consider
myself a Catholic.  What should I do and would
clergy judge me?” - Josh

CatholicView Staff:

I have never been a spiritual person, but have always considered myself a Catholic.  I have not been baptized or ever actually been to a Catholic service, that would include things like confession, communion, etc....  I am always ashamed to admit this others, for fear of judgment.   What steps do I need to take in order to actually become a better Catholic, and would a local clergy judge me? - Josh

 

Dear Josh:

Sadly you are not a Catholic.  Being Catholic means you have accepted and been baptized into the faith.  You would then be able to attend mass and participate in the sacraments of the Church.

A priest would not judge you.  He would invite you to take steps to become a full fledged Catholic in good standing by attending RCIA,(Rite of Christian Initiation For Adults) a program which introduces you to the Catholic Church and its family.

I urge you to follow through and talk to a priest about this.  You will then enjoy not only the sacraments but you will be part of the Church membership.  You will be welcomed.  God bless you always.  CatholicView Staff

 
“For 47 years my husband abuse and cheated on me.  I feel
I am having a breakdown.   Help me?” - Kit

CatholicView Staff:

I was 16 and he 18 when my husband and I married.  We have been married 47 yrs.  He is still abusive and has cheated twice, but he wants forgiveness. I just found out about the 2nd affair which was 30 yrs ago. It feels like it just happened.

Our kids are grown. I feel almost hate towards him.   I know its wrong. When I look at him I can't stand him.  He worked with both these women and I trusted him. I adored him. Even with the abuse; slappings, etc..over the years.  Not severe just humiliating abuse. He begs for forgiveness now.  He said the 2nd time he couldn't tell me because I would have left.  He is from abusive home also. I feel I am having breakdown. I have been to ER a lot these last 4 months.

Financially I can't make it alone.  What can I do??  Please, help me...thanks  -  Kit

 

Dear Kit:

I am so sorry to hear of your troubled marriage.  It is a terrible situation that you have endured these 47 years of your marriage.  On one hand, you are miserable with your husband and on the other, you financially cannot afford to leave him. 

Have you thought of perhaps getting a job so that you can support yourself?  Or asked your grown children to intervene?  Think about this possibility of living with one of your children until you decide what you would like to do with your life.  If you tell them what you have faced and are still facing, they will open their arms to you.    Very likely they already know, but do not want to interfere.  

Do not allow your husband to continue abusing you. 

I must advise you to see your parish priest.  He will talk to you about the options you have and advise you what to do.  He may also suggest a way that you can get the professional help that you need to live a normal and peaceful life.

We will pray that the Lord will provide the peace you seek.  Our prayers will be with you.  CatholicView Staff

 
“Because Mary was a virgin, does this mean she did not
have a vaginal birth with Jesus?” - Tenny

CatholicView Staff:

Does the belief that Mary was always a virgin mean that she did not experience a vaginal birth with Jesus?  This has been a discussion in our Bible study group, so I want to clear it up. – Tenny

 

Dear Tenney:

A virgin is a female who has not known a man sexually.  Any one who has not known a man in an intimate way is a virgin.  This was foretold in the bible.  Please read Matthew 1: 18-25.  And yes, Jesus Christ was born in a natural way.  I hope this clears things up for you.  May the Lord bless you.  - CatholicView Staff

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